Discipline…
I’m sure we’re not the only parents going through this phase of not knowing how to discipline our child, or at least I hope we’re not! For the most part Kellar is a very good child but here lately trying our patience is a huge understatement. He has taken up a liking to hitting and no matter how hard you spank him he’ll cry for a minute or so and then come back and smack you again..this will seriously go on for hours if the one that’s being hit doesn’t get up and leave the room. What do we do? Don’t say well I’d tear that butt up, it does no good. Time out does no good. Taking away the tv does no good. Taking away a toy does no good. Did I mention that tearing that butt up does no good? He for whatever reason thinks it’s funny, now me I’m thinking getting my rear end spanked to the point that I cry isn’t funny, nor will it be funny the 119th time that it happens because I insist on coming back for more but this child of mine, this very stubborn child of mine will not give up, he will not stop and I’m at a loss on what to do! To say that it’s frustrating is also a huge understatement. We don’t watch violent movies, we don’t wrestle around or encourage him to be a fighter though I do want him to understand that he can take up for himself if need be but come on Kellar mommy and daddy haven’t done anything to you son, take it easy on us please! I wonder if he’s doing it for attention, but I find it hard to believe that he’s starving for attention, anyone who knows us knows that Kellar is our world and everything revolves around him. Then I wonder if it could be he’s so used to having our attention that if we take it off him for any length of time to do something for ourselves he doesn’t like it? Kellar isn’t a kid that likes to sit and play for hours, he wants to do what he wants to do when he wants to do it and if it involves wanting us to play with him we do it, we play when he wants us to. If he wants to read I read, if he wants to color we color, if he wants to watch tv I let him watch it, I think he’s got it good so why does he act out? Is it just a age thing? A boy thing? A rotten child thing? I know he’s rotten and Joey and I have probably let him get by with far to much stuff, sure he’s only 3 but screaming no at us when he learned to use the word correctly should’ve been stopped the day it started but we didn’t and now we are of course realizing that it was a mistake to let it go on. I’m sure that you’re probably thinking my gosh whatta brat Kellar must be but he’s really not, he’s a very sweet little boy and I can assure you I’ve seen much worse, not that it makes it ok because someone has a bigger brat than we do but it does help me to realize that we’re not alone and obviously others have not found the right form of discipline. I almost feel bad for posting this because I do think that Joey and I have it very good on so many different levels with Kellar, he’s a very bright child, he’s come so far and I know that his stubborness has been a blessing in a lot of areas, he can be so sweet and his I love you’s still melt my heart but I also know that we’ve gotta get a hold on this discipline issue we’re having. Any ideas?????
3 Comments
- sheri replied:
no words of wisdom right now just wanted you to know you are NOT alone!! We are having a really hard time right now too! I keep hoping that being consistent and staying on top of things will pay off- it just might take a while
February 17th, 2010 at 5:10 pm. Permalink.
- Fateha's Mom replied:
oh dear! i know what you’re going through because Fateha has begun to show her COLORS too, recently, ever since she turned two.
for us Asians, and especially me and hubby, would spank her when we need to, when she does something terrible. so far, my hubby has been successful at disciplining her. one stare would send shivers down her spine.
but then again, she’s not so afraid of me. like Kellar, no matter how hard i spank her butt or slap her hand/foot, she’d give me a look.
i’m learning to adjust the ways of my handling her tantrums too. sometimes i find corporal punishments a necessity.
February 24th, 2010 at 7:47 am. Permalink.
- Angi replied:
Your post made me laugh. I have spanked Elizabeth twice and it was only out of my frustration it only was successful in winding her up.
We are very lucky in that Elizabeth is a very easy child and does not require much discipline, even when I put her on a time out (once in a blue moon) she sings away and sits happily until I get her.
I think consistency is a big key if you say something you must follow it through. I used to work with a behavior therapist and follow the rule for every negative you must give 7 positives. Praise is so important. If he is acting up walk away and ignore him, when he is behaving praise him and give him attention.March 29th, 2010 at 8:28 pm. Permalink.